01 March 2010
The Russians in London
Is it just me or does anyone else think that the Russians who are now blessing London with their presence are all complete and utter shits? Take yesterday as a case in point when I had an appointment with a Russian chiropodist who turned out to be not only a revolting tub of lard, but also the owner of some seriously wonky views to boot.
I'm not quite sure how the conversation turned to the Russian Revolution, but I was amazed to discover, courtesy of that rancid hag, that none of the revolutionary leaders was actually Russian. To start with Lenin was "German bastard with bit of Tartar gypsy blood". I think that the tub meant that his ancestors were Volga-German and Tarter, but her comments were less about cultural background and had more to do with the purity of the blood and stuff like that.
Staying on this theme I discovered that Uncle Joe Stalin was Georgian and that Trotsky was Joeish. I was also asked if I was Joeish, partly because it seems that I look Joeish, but also because only a Joe could refer to the man who helped kill the last royal family as uncle. The tub then went on to explain that the Romanovs have been sanctified by the Orthodox Church and that she has a shrine to their memory in her flat in one of the shittier parts of South London.
The following video is reproduced here especially for all and any fat tubs of lard who may drop by: