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22 June 2008
David Davis & a shami kebab moment
Just when you think that life can't get any sweeter, along comes the Nu-Labour gang and balls things up for themselves even more.

Yeah, it's back to David Davis all over again, who is just getting publicity the like of which you cannot buy courtesy of Nu-Lab and its prime spastics. Basically, it has emerged that some bird named Shami Chakrabarti, who heads a civil rights pressure group, has been advising Davis all along.

So far so boring, but then in stepped yet another Nu-Labour mong, and one who makes Luke Akehurst come over as a tactical genius. Step forward Andy Burnham, the Culture Secretary, who accused Madam Kebab of having "late-night, hand-wringing, heart-melting phone calls" with Davis. At which point the said Shami Kebab threatened to sue unless he withdrew the remark. Quite what he had said that was actionable is pretty debatable, but that's not the point.

It's also not the point that back in early spring of this year I was glugging beer with some old friends in London and the conversation turned to matters horizontal. To be fair it almost always does when I am around as I just have that effect on people. Anyway, one of my drinking companions leaned forward and told us all about a "front bench Tory" who was engaged in a leg-over situation with "some darkie".

There being no names and, therefore, no pack drill, I just filed away the tale and forgot about it. Besides, one politician getting his knob polished by one bit of spare fluff is hardly news, is it? I remember telling the gang about the time when a Mexican Congressional delegation went to China and were presented with a fine crop of mini-skirted talent in the hotel bar and each lucky delegate was then encouraged to pick two of them for the night. The girls were waiting for them in their rooms after they had drunk the bar dry. Now that's political gossip - as well as a great Chinese takeaway service come to think of it. . .

All that aside, I don't rate the Dave and Shami tale all that highly on the veracity scale. It may be just me, but when so much easy tottie is being laid on what senior figure in his right mind would waste time on this overweight female? Besides, her tits look scrawny to me. You could imagine her getting fucked, I suppose, but then fucked off immediately afterwards. Sorry, but I don't buy the hearts and flowers angle.

However, this ludicrous series of events has now snowballed and what we are seeing is a whole carefully constructed liberal-left middle class edifice come tumbling down. The silly sods are fighting each other, with various Nu-Labour types taking the side of either Burnham or the kebab woman. It is a delight to behold and is yet another nail in that Nu-Labour coffin.

It's even spread to the wankblogs! Frances Sedgemore was one of the more precious of the Drink Soaked Wankers For War bloggers and he has swished off in a queenly huff and is now screaming about me at his own blog. Don't ask me how I got roped into this but it is seriously entertaining.

As for us, I reckon that all we should do is sit back and leave them to get on with it. Maybe add the odd comment from time to time just to keep the feud simmering nicely, but other than that bollocks to 'em.

The important thing to remember is that we are heading for an all too rare moment when we get to be spectators at a political Battle of Cannae. A double envelopment is heading Nu-Labour's way as both the working class and liberal middle class desert it.

Given everything that has happened since the Crewe and Nantwich by-election, a question can now be seriously asked: will the party survive the next general election with any MPs at all?



Shami Kebab indeed!

23 June 2008 at 07:30  

I'm never going to appeal to the ideologically pure at heart, so I might as well give 'em something to get all twitchy about.

23 June 2008 at 16:29  

I like the great Chinese takeaway bit. Did that really happen?

24 June 2008 at 08:50  

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